Hey Stella, let's cut the crap (pun absolutely intended)

Conversation that just transpired between me, Stella, and my mom:


(Stella comes trotting very happily into the kitchen. She has been missing from the room for all of five minutes. Stella obviously has a trinket of some sort in her mouth.)

Me: Hi Stellz. What do you have in your mouth?

Suz: What does she have?

Me: Stella, spit it out..... Drop it Stella!

(Stella lowers her head in an attempt to guard/hide whatever is in her mouth. I reach down to extract said object with my hand because Stella is guarding it with her life and won't give it up. I feel the object. It's not that large, but it is very hard. I assume it's part of a dog bone or a lingering rogue baby toy from when Niece was here for Easter. [Boy was I wrong].)

Suz: What is it?

Me: OH MY WOW. IT'S HER POOP.

Suz (very calmly, not stirring from her chair): Are you joking?

Me: Why would I joke about something like that? It's her POOP!!!

Suz (gets up from her chair and starts meandering around the rooms of our downstairs): I wonder where she got it? And where the rest of it is?


It seems that Stella has continued to eat her own shit after all.

And this poop-log was HARD. Like Stella is hoarding little steaming piles all over the house until said time that the piles have hardened and turned into perfectly tote-able collections of poop-logs.

Looks like Suz and I got a little feces-themed scavenger hunt of our own as a day-after-Easter surprise from good ol' Stellz. As of post-time, we still have not found the missing excrement.

I think that calls for another beer in the name of the guano-loving furry ball of crazy that is Stella.