TV Crack.

It's official. Until the season finales of both Lost and The Bachelor air, I am never going to accomplish anything on Monday and Tuesday evenings.

This week, the 2 shows together devoured 5, yes FIVE, hours of my time. The Bachelor, with all of its romantic sap and positively DRIPPING with cheese (cue the subtle playing of "On the wings of love" in the background please), continues to hold my attention hostage and glued to my tube, with stars in my eyes and a shit-eating grin on my face for a solid two hours each Monday. And I can't even tell you why. Maybe it's because the show is the television series version of a romantic comedy. Maybe it's because all girls, at their most primal core, are delusional enough to think that The Bachelor resembles real life dating in any way, shape, or form. Maybe it's because in some small way, even if we won't admit to it, we humor ourselves into thinking that the situations on The Bachelor or in rom-coms could somehow happen in our lives. In reality, we know that there's no chance of this. But maybe, juuust maybe, we will walk out our front doors and find that the quirky, socially awkward guy who just moved in 2 doors down is actually (gasp) our soulmate! (Substitute any other generic rom-com plot here.)

Or maybe The Bachelor is just TV crack.

As for Lost....Anyone who has been watching this show since episode 1 is just so damn, for lack of a better term, LOST at this point that we have to keep watching for those few little nuggs of information they feed us each week so that our heads don't explode. Every Lost fanatic I know has their own little theory of what the HELL is going on on the island, who Jacob is, what Ben or Locke's divine purpose will end up being....Lost theories abound. Personally, I have no f***ing clue what is happening. So, I watch. I've invested too many hours in the previous 5 seasons NOT to waste 2 more of them every Tuesday night to find out. Plus, I'm obsessed with Sayid (and Desmond). Plus, it's TV crack. The island wants me to watch...


So what does this mean for me? Well, last night it meant that I started all of my schoolwork at approximately 11:30 pm. When 3 am rolled around, I called it a night. So Dickens and Zora Neale Hurston got the shaft? BIG WHOOP. At least I know that Jake once again kept skanky, raccoon-eyed Vienna around for another week, and that Desmond is back in action on Oceanic 815.

Hurston and Dickens will still be around when the seasons conclude, and they will still be boring. Good, quality trashy TV shows only come around every so often. Here's to hoping Jake cuts the tramps next week, because lord knows I'll be watching.